Bummer

I hope you all had a Merry Christmas!

Just dropping a quick post here before heading off to bed to let you know I won't be around for a couple of weeks. My computer needs a new something computer techy. JC is working on it for me now but we have to order the part so I won't be up and running again until it comes in. I am stuck with the kids computer and ya'll know how much I detest using their computer so I will see you when mine is fixed.

Have a Very Happy New Year!

Conversations With A Three Year Old

Me- Who's that?

Dub- Piwate Ducky. Argh Quack Quack! He got a telscope dare on dat wing.

Me- Really? What does he do with a telescope?

Dub- It's not a telscope! It's noculars. He wooks at da bad guys wif his majnation and day pways kitar.

Me- They're binoculars and He looks at the bad guys with his imagination and they are playing the guitar?

Dub- Yep.

Me- Hmm. Are you my boy?

Dub- Nope. I dad's boy. *sees Vootz playing with his soldiers* An I see dose tonks you got dare and they vroom.

Me- You're dad's boy! *fake pout*

Dub- Yep. Wook out da bad guys!

Me- Are those tanks going to vroom to the bad guys?

Dub- I wasn't talking you! I was talking Vootz!

Me- Sorry. I thought you were talking to me.

Dub- No. I talking to G Ji Joe.

Me- No. You just said you were talking to Vootz. Who are you talking to, GI Joe or Vootz?

Dub- I said I was talking to Daaad! *shakes head and rolls eyes.

Me- Okay random.

Dub- Ine not wandom! Ine W.

All I Want For Christmas Is My Two Front Teeth

Buzz lost his other bottom tooth today. I noticed while I was helping him lose his other bottom tooth that his top two teeth are also loose.

Me-What are you going to do when you lose your top teeth too.

Buzz-I'm just going to grow these two in first, then I will grow out my top teeth.

Me-Hey Buzz, say sausage.

Buzz-sau..

Me-*grin

Buzz-Mommm! Don't laugh at me!

Me-Hey Buzz say, Sally sells seashells down by the sea shore!

Buzz-*tantrum* Mom quit making fun of me!

I love toothless kids! Except for the part where they wake me up at 5:30am on the ONLY morning I get to sleep in to tell me the Tooth Fairy came and only left him 2 dollars and he wanted 5. Boy will he be in for a shock to see that the going rate for subsequent teeth is only 50 cents.

Price Gouging Negativity

Today in my house sounded like this...

No
Get Down
Don't Do That
Stop It
Don't Touch
Close It
Sit Down
No
Later
Shut It
Not Now
Knock It Off
Quiet Down
Hands Off
Get Out
Don't
Stop
Get Off
No
Shhh!
Quit......

Do you ever have those days that it seems all you say is negative?

On a positive note...

Buzz lost his first tooth today. He has had both bottom teeth loose since May, he just today, lost his first one. He was not so excited about losing his teeth. He would not wiggle them, would not let me get my hand anywhere near his mouth, would not eat anything that would help loosen them. Today the new tooth finally pushed through enough that the old one was just barely hanging on. Vootz and Buzz were playing with my flash light looking down each others throats, looking for Buzz's filling, looking at uvulas, looking for who knows what else. So under the guise of cavity hunting I had him open his mouth...

Me-"Ooo I think I see one. Look Vootz right there *putting my hand in* see right *yank* oh nope it was just a loose tooth."

Buzz-"Mommmmm! Don't pull iiiit...hey is that my tooth?"

Vootz-"Yep, I told you it doesn't hurt."

Buzz-"Cool! I bet the Tooth Fairy brings me LEGO's Star Wars 2."

Vootz-"The Tooth Fairy only brings money, like maybe 20 or 60 bucks"

Me-"Like maybe 20 or 60 cents."

Buzz-"No, it's my first tooth and first teeth are worth 10 dollars. That is what K got for his last year."

Me-"Have you heard of this thing called recession?"

*crickets*

I think we need to have a Tooth Fairy Union meeting to come up with a plan to establish an equal market.

Old Man Winter Is Knocking

I survived the first week of four thirty mornings! Two or three of those mornings the boys had 3 hour fog delays, I am not sure what days or how many because the days seem to just be running together. When they have delays they don't go to school until 11 and don't get out until 3:30 which leaves only time in the afternoon to do homework, eat dinner, feed the animals, shower and go to bed. Which is kind of nice that they don't have time to destroy the house I cleaned while they were at school but it has been hard for them not to have any outside play time. They don't get hardly any free play outside at school so when they get home they are ready to run wild, race bikes, play GI Joe, Spies, Hide and Seek and Tag. They were excited about the sunshine and no fog we had today, unfortunately we still could not go out side to play because we had two very aggressive pit bulls, who had already bitten another child and charged my friend, roaming our street.

One last thing. Old Man Winter only knocks here about every 10 years. It is that time again. It has been fairly cold, for here anyway. We don't usually get more than sweatshirt weather in these parts so I am very unequipped for anything colder than 50 degrees. We have had Christmas's when we've worn shorts and t-shirts. I don't even think anyone around here has a "winter coat" that consists of more than a heavy weight hoodie. This morning when I walked the boys to school I am not sure what temperature it was but it was pretty cold and windy. I am not complaining mind you...I like winter, it is my favorite season. It would be nice if I was prepared for it though, maybe with a coat, a fireplace not that we can use them here or maybe a car for those cold drizzly mornings. Dub has not been too thrilled about the temperatures. He is usually still asleep when it is time to go so I have to pull him out of his nice snuggley bed, throw on his socks and sweatshirt, wrap him in a blanket and bed him down in the wagon. He cries. Today I thought the tears might actually freeze to his cheeks. He also refuses to get dressed all day. He will not take his pj's off even long enough to get dressed because he doesn't want to be cold. It is suppose to be much colder this coming week, in fact they are talking about possible snow showers on the valley floor. I might just have to find me a coat somewhere.

Four Thirty AM Cake Ball Coma

A few things...

Why is it that on days the boys and I can sleep in they always wake up at the crack of dawn? But on days we have to get up and go I can't hardly drag them out of bed? Like on Saturday, they were all awake at 6:30 but Sunday, I had to wake every one of them up at 7:30 and make them get out of bed for church. Today is a 3 hour fog delay, they don't have to be to school until 11:00am they were all up at 6:40. Not that today it really matters much to me, I was up at 4:30 to send JC off to work. I was not planning on going back to bed, but I kind of was looking forward to the quiet time alone.

Monday was JC's first day at his new job. He likes it okay, but it will take some getting use to being an employee and not the boss. I have a guilt thing going on though. I get up at 4:30 to prepare breakfast, pack his lunch etc. when he leaves sometimes I want to crawl back under the covers, it's warm there, and sleep until the kids get up, but I can't. I feel so guilty that he is having to be up that I feel like I should be up too. I also feel guilty if I am doing nothing. i.e. right now, sitting at the desk blogging while he is bustin' his bum making a living for us...totally feeling the guilt. I have started accomplishing so much during the day while he is gone. When he was home "doing nothing" I did nothing, well not nothing I have four boys and a husband to care for after all, but not as much as I should have been doing. Now I accomplish so much that by 2 pm I am walking around wondering what else I can do to stay busy, because I can't sit down and relax, that would not be fair, JC is not sitting down relaxing. Then I remember I should probably pick up my kids from school. Then I wonder how long I could leave them there before the school calls me to come get them. I find out, not more than 10 min. There is homework to do, snacks to get and dinner to start. When all that is done I still find myself walking around the house just looking for something to do that makes me feel like I am being productive.

Yesterday, I made cake balls as a way of "being productive". This guilt thing of mine could so be a bad thing. When I run out of things to do I usually end up puttering around in the kitchen. More food is the last thing JC and I both need. We were actually going to use this new chapter in our lives to start getting healthier. You know, not sitting at the computer all day, doing nothing but snacking and hoping that clicking the mouse burns off an insane amount of calories. Looks like I am going to have to find a new hobby, but not before I try the cake balls with Red Velvet cake, Cream Cheese frosting and White Chocolate coating. I think I will also make a batch for my dad with German Chocolate cake, German Chocolate frosting and Carmel coating rolled in toasted coconut and pecans. Oooo maybe a batch with Fudge cake, Mint frosting and Dark Chocolate coating....Ohh the possibilities!

How do you spell spoiled? D-U-B!

I woke up Rub to take him to the bathroom before I went to bed last night. Well, as woke up as a four year old gets at midnight. I stood behind him at the toilet because I learned early on that kids never really wake up all the way for these late night bathroom visits and have a tendency to walk away from the toilet still spraying or just fail to aim completely. Since he was only half awake I had him propped up against my legs and the little stinker (pun totally intended)toots on me, no, not a cute little boy toot, a full on man fart!

Me totally overstating the obvious- "Hey you tooted on me!"

Rub- *mumbles something*

Me- "What?"

Rub-*more mumbling*

Me-"What? I can't understand you."

Rub *sounding a bit perturbed now* "I saaaidd, Whooo caaares!"

Me-"I care, it was my leg you blasted."

Rub-*sounding very valley-ish* "what ever"


I got my order of See's Gourmet Lolly Pops yesterday. I ordered them from a kid up the street who was doing a fundraiser. I was so excited. The lolly pops are the only See's candy I like, and ohhh do I like them!

Dub had a late nap yesterday and so it was no surprise that he was not asleep at nine last night. I had been in the living room watching something on the tv but got bored so I came into the office with JC. Dub was suppose to be in his bed.

Dub standing in the office doorway with his hands on his hips.-"ahem, eccuse me. You're stupost to be in your wivving woom!" *holding his right hand out like Vana White toward the living room.*

Me-" ahem, excuse me, you're suppose to be in your bed."

Dub-"No! No I not. I stupost to be pwaying twains *spies my lolly pop* an I need a wick on that wawwy you got dare."

Me-"No you're not suppose to be playing trains, no you don't need a lick of my lolly.

Dub-"Yes! Dad telled me that."

Me-"I did not hear dad tell you anything"

Dub-"Yes! He telled me that with his wittle voice."

Me-"Dub, I did not hear dad whisper anything to you with his little voice, besides dad doesn't even know how to whisper with a little voice. Go to bed!"

Dub *crawls into his dad's lap where he is given a lick of JC's lolly pop and allowed to stay comfortable seated.*

Can you say spoiled little Daddy's boy! I can, DUB! See how nicely I said that. And don't even get me started on the cavity issues there!

Romeo Can't Play Today, He's Grounded!

My 8 year old has always had a girl crazy streak, even as a baby but I came across something while I was cleaning today that just freaked me out a bit. I found a letter he had written to a classmate and this is what it said...

10/9/08
Dear Maekena,
I like love you. I haven't had the time to tell you.

OH...MY...GOSH! He is 8! Aren't girls suppose to have cooties? I am glad he never "had the time" to give it to her. Or maybe he did, maybe that was just a rough draft. I don't know. I decided I need to have a talk with him about girls and what is appropriate at his age. As I am having this revelation the phone rings...

P-"Hello, Mrs. Moncur?"
Me-"Yes"
P-"This is Mrs. P. Vootz is okay, I don't want you to be alarmed. But he is having some trouble today with being distracted, talking, not listening and not getting his work done. I just wanted to make you aware of the situation."
Me-"Okay, thank you. I will have a talk with him when he gets home and we will solve the problem. Thank you for keeping me informed."
P-"No problem Mrs. Moncur Thank you. I will be looking forward to a better day with Vootz tomorrow. Bye"

Double Whammy! When I picked Vootz up from school he had that hang dog look on his face. He knew Mrs. P had called me and he knew he was going to be in trouble. He sulked all the way home. When we got home I called him into the office and shut the door...

Me-"Umm, Vootz who is Maekena?"

Vootz-"Just a friend mom" looking around frantically trying to figure out how I knew about Maekena and why I wasn't talking about his behavior at school today. Then he spies the letter in my hand. "What!? That's mine! I had it in my own personal journal stuff! Mom! You're not suppose to read people's private property!"

Me-"First of all Vootz, as long as you live under my roof for free, you have no private property. Second of all, I found this on the floor of your bedroom, not in your journal. Third, you should not be telling girls that you love them."

Vootz-"It's not like that mom! I mean I love her like a friend. And those brothers of mine got into my stuff mom! I had that with my baseball cards and my journal and they are not suppose to touch them. I put a sign on them that said to keep out!"

Me-"Maybe, if you mean it like a friend next time you should just say that you like her and are glad that you are friends, not that you love her. The only girls you should say that to are mommy, aunts and grandmas. You know that there is to be no hugging, kissing or holding hands right? No girlfriends Vootz until you are in high school, remember? And if you don't want your brothers who CANNOT read to get into your things a sign that they have to read is probably not your best choice right? Maybe you should try putting your stuff away in your drawer that they cannot reach next time. Also we don't have any secrets from mom and dad okay. If there is something you cannot talk to us about then it is something you should not be doing. If you do it anyway, you will get in trouble and don't think we won't find out about it because we will. Parents always do, it is like a super power we have. So, no secrets, Deal?

Vootz-"Okay mom. Can I have a snack now?" walking out the door.

Me-"HOLD IT! I am not done with you. Sit down!"

Vootz-Flops back into the chair and rolls his eyes.

Me-"Unless you want me to knock those eyes out of your head don't you dare roll them at me again!"

Vootz-"Sorry mom, I've just had a bad day okay!" *tears flowing* "And you're just going to make it worse. Sometimes I just can't sit still, I just get tired of school and I have so much going on in my head and I just need to talk it out.

The conversation continued on for about an hour so I won't bore you with anymore dialog. Let me just say, I am sorry mom and dad for all the hell I put you through as a kid and all those times you cursed me to have a kid just like me! Yep thanks alot, are ya happy now? Want to know what he had going on in his head that was so important to talk about? My brother got in a car accident in his patrol car Saturday and he said he was worried about Uncle J. and was wondering how the crash happened if the other patrol car hit him on the side or in the front and if Uncle J's car flipped over....So I guess he was talking through how he figured the accident went down to his neighbor and then after being told to quit talking to the neighbor he was talking it out to himself and got in trouble.

BTW...my brother is fine. A little sore with some little scratches and bruises but just fine. His car however, not so much. And the guy they were chasing was caught so that is good.

I Survived...Almost...Kinda...Well, not really.

I survived! The last four days have been a little bit OVERWHELMING! It all started with JC replacing a piece of door frame around the front door that has been broken for more than a year. Why he chose to replace it now I will never understand. I think he has a little whisper in his head that says, "hey add one more stress to your wife, lets see how much more she can take before she cracks! *evil cackle*" Why does JC replacing molding add stress to me you ask? Because he just hangs the stuff, I then had to paint it. Because the plan was to touch up the rest of the house eventually too, I figured I would just do it while I had the mess out anyway I did not want to have to wash the roller and brushes more than once. So I "touched up" the rest of the house, which turned out to be more of repainting the whole house instead of touching up(That's what you get when you have four boys).

Then I need to shampoo the carpets because we have four boys were having JC's family over for Thanksgiving and I wanted the house to look nice.

I also had another get together I had to cook for, two different classroom parties to cook for, an order of 2 dozen wheat rolls, 2 dozen white rolls and a dozen cinnamon rolls to make for a lady who was purchasing them from me for her Thanksgiving. Wheat rolls, white rolls, cinnamon rolls, coconut cream pie, pumpkin carmel cheesecake, blackberry pie, whipped cream, homemade cranberry sauce, 10 pounds of mashed potatoes, stuffing and a turkey to make for our Thanksgiving. Plus all the grocery shopping and rounding up all the supplies like tables and chairs, napkins, table clothes etc. Clean my house and keep my kids entertained so they would not destroy the house again. On top of all the normal everyday tasks like preparing meals, doing laundry, cleaning house, wiping noses, making beds, getting kids to and from school....

But I did it! I survived it all, with a cold even and no caffeine almost. I had all the clean up done and fell into the bed at midnight only to be woke up at 1:00am with a croupy child, to go back to bed at 2:00am after said child's breathing treatment, to get up again at 3:45am to brave the masses for Black Friday shopping! Which wasn't for Christmas but for Sunday clothes for Vootz who has a tendency to completely out grow his clothes overnight and always with three or four weeks to go before his Birthday or Christmas. Just long enough he can't wait for the new clothes to be a gift without having to miss a month of church. I was back home in bed by 6:30 and up again at 7:00 to get Buzz breakfast, 7:20 to get Rub breakfast, 8:00 to tell Vootz to be quiet, 9:00 to go pee, and 10 to tell the people at the door "No Thank you"... Sleep? I don't need no stinking sleep! Caffeine? I don't need no stinking caffeine either!... Psharrr! Ya right and monkeys might fly out of my butt too!

Hello, my name is Kiwi and I am an addict. I fell off the wagon today when I ahem had to go to Home Depot for a new door knob and somehow ended up at Sonic with a large diet Coke in my hand which I am pretty sure was consumed entirely with one long swallow. Though I am not entirely certain because as soon as the liquid gold hit my lips time stood still and I felt like I was floating away on fluffy, white, cottony clouds... The good news is it had been weeks with no caffeine at all and my heart was doing better and everyone in my house is still alive. The bad news is I have to get passed the "craving" stage all over again, my heart is going a little haywire tonight and I am wide awake when I should really be sleeping, but hey, who needs sleep anyway?

NaNaNaNa, NaNaNaNa, Nonese..ense

The title of this post really doesn't have anything much to do with the contents contained here in. I just have that tune stuck in my head. A couple of updates real fast before I head off to bed...

1. I have been caffeine free for so long I can't remember how long it's been! 18 days, 2 hours and 14 min. I have yet to do any too much harm to any innocent bystanders. The lack of caffeine is also why at only 10:15 I am heading off to bed when I would usually be up until well after midnight. The medication, no caffeine, and less sodium, seem to be helping the heart issue, so hopefully things will continue to get better.

2. In the last two weeks I have only had TWO sodas, both sprite and both small. (Again the sodium thing.)

3. Both my boys made honor roll and have had perfect attendance. Buzz was sick for a few days, running low temp at night, cough, sore throat, runny nose. No temps in the morning and said he was fine. He fought me tooth and nail to go to school. How is a mom suppose to argue with a first grader who INSISTS on going to school? The next week he was still not well and I made him stay home and he threw HUGE tantrums because I would not let him go to school. This week he is still NOT well but is going to school. I have not been able to get him to his doctor because he is in India visiting his family. The same thing happened last year when Buzz got strep REALLY bad, the doctor was in India. I told Buzz he needs to start scheduling his sick days around Doctor A's vacations. He did not think mommy was funny.

4. On to more exciting news, well at least for me. Remember this post? I finally made page one of Google search for "Don't Pee On My Floor!" Also page one for Kiwimoncur! I feel so Legit! Woo Hoo! I love you Google! I'd like to thank my husband and boys who made all this happen. without you I would have no totally embarrassing dirt to tell the entire web audience , I would also like to thank all ten thousand of my loyal readers...tap tap is this thing on? Hello? Hello, anyone out there? Can you hear me? *crickets chirping*

NaNaNaNa, NaNaNaNa, Hey, Hey, Hey Good Bye!

If You Give A Mom A Muffin...

This very true little story came to me via email from my Dad's wife. You mom's will totally relate.

If you give a mom a muffin, she'll want a cup of coffee to go with it. She'll pour herself some. Her four-year-old will spill the coffee. She'll wipe it up. Wiping the floor, she will find dirty socks. She'll remember she has to do laundry. When she puts the laundry in the washer, she'll trip over boots and bump into the freezer. Bumping into the freezer will remind her she has to plan dinner. She will get out a pound of hamburger. She'll look for her cookbook. (101 Things To Make With A Pound Of Hamburger.) The cookbook is sitting under a pile of mail. She will see the phone bill, which is due tomorrow. She will look for her checkbook. The checkbook is in her purse that is being dumped out by her two-year-old. She'll smell something funny. She'll change the two-year-old. While she is changing the two-year-old the phone will ring. Her five-year-old will answer and hang up. She'll remember that she wants to phone a friend to come for coffee. Thinking of coffee will remind her that she was going to have a cup. She will pour herself some. And chances are, if she has a cup of coffee, her kids will have eaten the muffin that went with it.

Games People Play

I was tagged by JC's cousin Maria. I love her and her family. She has the cutest boys ever! (Her blog is private so I am sorry you will have to take my word for it.) Her parents are the sweetest people you will ever meet, and I have a lot of respect for her and her homemaking skills.

*5 Things I was doing 10 years ago...
1.) Adjusting to life as a newlywed
2.) Looking for a job
3.) Playing a lot of cards with Russ and Willow
4.) Going to the Gym with Russ and Willow as an excuse to come home and sit in the Hot Tub
5.) Learning how to live with JC

*5 Things on my "To-Do" list today...ok, h'bout tomorrow?
1.) Mop
2.) Laundry
3.) Wash bedding
4.) Iron Church clothes
5.) Play a new board game with the boys

*5 Snacks I enjoy...
1.) Jalapeno cheese bread
2.) diet pepsi
3.) Yorks
4.) Chocolate donuts (chocolate pop tarts will work in a pinch)
5.) McDonalds Apple Pie

*5 Things I'd do if I were a Millionaire...
1.) Pay off our debt
2.) Buy a house on land
3.) Buy a car
4.) Help out my family and friends
5.) help people anonymously, just because i can!+ditto

*5 Places I've Lived...
1.) California
2.)
3.)
4.)
5.)

*5 Jobs I've Had
1.) Waitress
2.) retail clerk
3.) secretary
4.) medical assistant
5.) bookkeeper

*5 People I tag
1.) Karrie
2.) Syndie
3.) Karen
4.) Lacy
5.) Beyla

If At First You Don't Succeed...Your Heart Will Go Haywire and Your Doctor Will Wag His Finger At You!

I have not made a post in a while because I have been a little "postal" haha. No seriously I have been a little on edge. I finally decided to My doctor is making me! kick the soda habit for good. I cut back to a can a day for a week, then to a 1/2 a can a day for two days then none at all. It has been 5 days now with absolutely no soda. Except for the gulp of JC's Mt. Dew I swigged at lunch yesterday out of pure desperation, which made me immediately gag. I cannot stand that stuff, Icky, Eww, Yucky, Gross! I have tried many, many times to kick this habit and have failed miserably at every attempt. Not this time! I am going to do it! Not that I have a choice My neighbor, Dub's Gweg, offered me a diet Dr. Pepper this afternoon and as hard as it was I said No, thank you. Then he had to bring out the big guns and tempt me with a diet Pepsi, and as hard as it was I stood strong. Then I came in the house and started eating and drinking anything I could find to satisfy my craving for a soda. In the last 5 hours I have consumed:
3 glasses of ice water
1 apple
1 chocolate chip Pop Tart
hamburger pie
salad
2 glasses of milk
1 box of sour patch kids
a bite of Creme brulee (gagged, again)
6 Oreos
another glass of milk
a lollipop
a banana
a glass of Tang
a piece of gum
and a York

I still want a Pepsi! I am sick to my stomach and so full I had to take my pants off which would not be bad if they weren't yoga pants but I am about ready to jump in the truck and go to the AM PM just for an ice cold diet Pepsi. I will not however because that would require putting my pants back on I HAVE WILL POWER! I WILL BEAT THIS ADDICTION!
I will focus on the future. On tomorrow. On Breakfast! On chocolate donuts! One habit at a time folks, one habit at a time.

Public Service Annnouncement

Just a reminder to all of you in the USA...

DO NOT FORGET TO VOTE!!

Common Sense

This came to me via email from my mom. I am not sure who wrote it, but who ever wrote it did a great job so I want to share it with you.

' London Times' Obituary

An Obituary printed in the London Times........ Interesting and sadly rather true.



'Today we mourn the passing of a beloved old friend, Common Sense, who has been with us for many years. No one knows for sure how old he was, since his birth records were long ago lost in bureaucratic red tape. He will be remembered as having cultivated such valuable lessons as:

Knowing when to come in out of the rain; why the early bird gets the worm; Life isn't always fair; and maybe it was my fault.

Common Sense lived by simple, sound financial policies (don't spend more than you can earn) and reliable strategies (adults, not children, are in charge).

His health began to deteriorate rapidly when well-intentioned but overbearing regulations were set in place. Reports of a 6-year-old boy charged with sexual harassment for kissing a classmate; teens suspended from school for using mouthwash after lunch; and a teacher fired for reprimanding an unruly student, only worsened his condition.

Common Sense lost ground when parents attacked teachers for doing the job that they themselves had failed to do in disciplining their unruly children.

Common Sense declined even further when schools were required to get parental consent to administer sun lotion or an Aspirin to a student; but could not inform parents when a student became pregnant and wanted to have an abortion.

Common Sense lost the will to live as the churches became businesses; and criminals received better treatment than their victims. Common Sense took a beating when you couldn't defend yourself from a burglar in your own home and the burglar could sue you for assault.

Common Sense finally gave up the will to live, after a woman failed to realize that a steaming cup of coffee was hot. She spilled a little in her lap, and was promptly awarded a huge settlement.

Common Sense was preceded in death by his parents Truth and Trust, his wife Discretion, his daughter Responsibility and his son, Reason.

He is survived by his 4 stepbrothers;

I Know My Rights

I Want It Now

Someone Else Is To Blame

I'm A Victim

Not many attended his funeral because so few realized he was gone.

Prop 8 Video

This post is probably not going to make me real popular with some people who read my blog. I don't take a lot of political stands but this is beyond political. This is a moral issue that I feel the need to take a stand on. I am not here to win a popularity contest, just here to be able to express myself so that is what I am going to do. PLEASE VOTE YES ON PROP 8! I am not a hateful or judgemental person. If you want to live a certain way that is fine with me but DO NOT try to tell my children what is acceptable behavior. That is MY job. I found this video on My Byrd House.

Just Another Fluff Post

My mom gave me her camera. It is a very very nice 35mm old school film camera. It takes lovely pictures. A few weeks later her husband gave me his digital camera too. It is also a very nice camera. The problem is I cannot get the computer to recognize the camera so I can get the pictures off of it. So I am going to have to take it to Walmart too. They also gave me Photoshop, but I have not figured out how to use it yet so here are a few of the old school shots straight out of the camera. Not too bad.

Rub's not happy

Vootz the Poser

Dub "Here I am!" Hiding in the tree

Buzzy Blue Eyes

Dub snuggling Bebe and Fluvie

Rub snuggling Fluvie

Pickin' Apples

I finally made it back to Walmart to get my picture CD from our apple picking trip. Here are a few cute shots of Dub and Rub! I think Dub had more fun just playing in the dirt.


Rub and Dub burying the apples.


"Here's an Apple Mom!"


Lil' Dub

Mish Mash McDonald's Trash

Okay, so my friend Karrie over at Trailer Life has updated her blog making me feel more like the slacker we all know that I am. So I figured I should pop over here to my little page and say a little about our happenings at Casa de Moncur lately. The thing is, I have not been feeling any bit creative and that was the whole point of starting my blog to begin with was to have a creative outlet for all my nonsense that rambles through my troubled little mind. So when there is no nonsense hahah never has there been no nonsense or when I am just too tired to spew out all the nonsense onto this lovely blog, I tend to avoid posting. Wow, I just used the word nonsense four times five now in one paragraph. Overkill?

I dug deep into afore mentioned troubled mind and only was able to come up with a few little snip-its of crap to write about...kind of a mish mosh mash post if you will.

My shingles are finally healing. Just in time for Vootz to bring home a wonderful cold to all of us.

Buzz jumped off the top bunk last night and landed his hip on the trundle frame and now has a lovely little bruise and a limp. I was waiting for the school to call today to find out who beat him. Not really, but you know when your kid gets a horrific bruise that thought always pops into mind. I did not have a lot of sympathy for my screaming, writhing in pain little monster because 1. He was suppose to be asleep not playing superman. 2. He has been told countless times that he cannot fly he wasn't even wearing the cape! What was he thinking 3. He's been told countless times "Do Not Jump off Vootz's bed!

Dub has started saying..."cracks me up to pieces" when he thinks something is funny. His new favorite joke is:
Knock Knock
Who's there?
Howie
Howie who?
How we doin' taday? *through a giggle*
I'ne so funny I cracks me up to pieces *slaps his leg*

Rub had started saying something that "cracks me up to pieces"...He says, "silly ol me." or "silly ol' you" when something is said or done that is wrong. Like he put his shoes on the wrong feet today and when I told him he says, "oops, silly ol' me"

Vootz got a question wrong on a test he took the other day. I think, IMHO that it was correct but hey you tell me.

McDonald's French Fries are the best fast food french fries. FACT or OPINION
He answered FACT. It was marked wrong. Come on! We all know that it is a FACT! McDonald's does have the best french fries. Too bad we are boycotting them because of their Prop 8 Hating ways! Bye Bye fries, apple pies, sausage McGriddles and 69 cent diet Cokes! I will miss you. I might be able to fit into my jeans again soon, but I will miss you. Speaking of jeans, I can say good bye to Levi's too. What's up with these big companies fighting prop 8? I wish I could boycott PG&E!

As for other news, the transmission went out in JC's truck. That makes both vehicles down and out with no transmissions. He was offered a job finally, but they do not want to pay him enough to even pay our rent and the fuel it will cost him to get to work and back every day. The first chance for a raise is in two years. JC told them he would love to work for them but he could not do it for that pay. He told them what he need to make per year and yesterday they came to us with a counter offer. if you call it that They offered him another WHOPPING two thousand a year. WoooHooo another $166 a month. Who do they think can live off of that kind of pay? Seriously! Even if I was still working we could not make it on that and we don't live high on the hog. Any of you that have been to our house know that. Both our vehicles are twenty + years old so we don't have car payments even. Cazy! That's all. They are just CRAZY! Then they went into what a generous benefit package they had if you call 80/20 generous but the fact of the matter is benefits do not feed four hungry boys! Nor do they pay PG&E prop 8 haters. So we are still looking for work.

So that is my update. Now I am off to find something to eat that will stave off the craving I am having for McDonald's Apple Pie! prop 8 haters! Gotta go mess with a girls comfort food! Darn it!

Talking To Myself....again

Life is sucking a bit more lately. I had what I thought was an unexplainable knee injury last week. I was really hurting and had no idea why. Then a few days later I got what I thought were spider bites on my inner thigh. Then a strange patch of blisters showed up on my inner knee too. The whole inner thigh connecting both patches of blisters was very tender to the touch. This is when it dawned on me, are you ready?...Ahhhh Crap! I have a Shingles out break! Yep. You heard me Shingles!
This is not the first, nor will it be my last outbreak of this lovely virus. When I wear myself out physically, mentally and emotionally for too long I get sick. It usually starts with simple things like headache, nausea. Sometimes I will get a sore throat or just break out like a hormonal teenager. When I fail to heed these warnings my body gives me it starts to shout a little louder. I imagine it saying something like this,
"Hey STUPID!" this is a cuss word in our house. So my body is being very serious now. Like I was saying, or my body was saying, "Hey STUPID, I need to rest. I tried to make you just tired and you did not rest. I tried to make your head hurt so bad that all you would want to do was close your eyes, but you just put on sunglasses, I tried to make you throw up anything you ate but you just quit feeding me not that you were giving me proper nutrition to begin with, if you were I probably would not be in the state I am in. And NO, Pepsi and chocolate donuts is NOT proper nutrition! So because you fail to heed my gentle warnings I will have to hit you with the mother load! You have to stay home because it would not be responsible of you to expose chicken pox (that is the same virus) to anyone who has not had them yet. Think of the little babies and little old grannies and gramps's out there. So stay home and don't think you'll be able to do anything but rest, because the pain is so severe you'll just want to take Benedryl and Vicodin and go to bed. So haha you body neglecting moron, take that! Maybe now you will start listening to me."

To which I reply, "Shingles is that the best you have? Shingles, really? I have four kids, a husband and a BFF and her family who all need me right now and you think a little case of Shingles is going to keep me down. I can rest when I am dead! This is in no way an invitation for you to die on me! Please give me a real warning before that happens, like maybe a headache so bad I just want to close my eyes. What's that you say? You've tried that before? Hmmm.

What Do You Get When You Cross Kiwi With Sugar & Caffeine?

(To get the appropriate "feel" for this post try reading it super fast with no pauses and quick rambly like a teenage girl talks. That is the way it is coming out of my head.)

My sister in law took my kids for a play date this evening. Wanting to take full advantage of the situation I decided I did not want to cook dinner and we should go out to eat. The conversation went something like this...Oh, wait let me set the scene first. I look like a wench, because I did not get a shower or time to brush my hair or put on make up before offering up my self to babysit for a friend all day while she sat in the ER with her husband (a whole other post). JC has done yard work and was at the time reclined in his desk chair zoned into a replay.

Me-"I'm hungry. We have no kids, if I shower and make myself presentable, do you want to go out? What sounds good?"

JC-"A glass of ice water."

I get his water and head off to the shower, do my hair, make up and get dressed, it took me 20 minutes. (Like I said, I was hungry!)

Return to the office.

JC-"What are you dressed up for?"

Me-"I said, I'm hungry! I need to eat. I am going, do you want to come or should I bring you home something?"

JC-"Oh. No I will go. Where do you want to go because I'm not dressed up and I'd need a shave...."

Me-"I'll give you thirty minutes then I'm leaving with or without you!"

He took forty, but I was feeling generous so I waited. Tell me how I was able to shower, shave, dry and straighten my hair, apply make up and be ready in twenty and all he had to do was shower and shave I even got his clothes out for him! and it took him twice as long. This is typical for us. He is soooo slow. He always makes us late. Drives me crazy. I can have myself and all four boys completely ready for church on time and he will be late. Anyway, I am off topic. We went to the Elephant Bar. We totally over ate and even had dessert. It was tasty! That was the extent of our "date". We came home and he turned on his computer. I called my SIL to tell her we were home if she was ready to unload kids and I heard the most wonderful words ever uttered...

SIL-"Can the kids stay for a sleep over?"

Me-"What, all four of them?" *crossing fingers*

Her-"Yes, if that's okay."

Me-"Sure, I will bring their things by later."*dancing a jig o' joy!*

Then I retired to the driveway to talk with my BFF. Where I talked a mile a minute because at dinner I had some three Pepsi, and it was not even diet and for dessert it was a slice giant slab of Mud Pie. Then while standing bouncing, sitting, swaying, pacing I ate devoured a few whole bag of my favorite cookies. Can you say caffeine and sugar high!! I was not even hungry for those cookies by the way. Why did I eat them then, you ask? Because I could. I could eat them with out interruption. I could eat them and not have eight grubby fists in the bag. I could eat them and savour every bite. if I had not inhaled them because I was WIRED! Woo hoo! It has been a good night. Unfortunately it is continuing to be a good night. My sugar high and caffeine induced mania has not subsided, nor do I expect it will for many, many more hours. Tomorrow, I will pay dearly for this. The kids will be home by eight. They have Primary Program practice at 10. I have boxes of apples that need to be turned into all manor of appley deliciousness tomorrow. (more on the apple picking experience when I can manage to brave Wally World to have the film developed and put on disc) I am not sure I how well I am going to be functioning come tomorrow! Oh snap, it is tomorrow!

I am like a teenager who's parents leave them alone for the first time over night. You see, this is only the second time since we've had kids that we have been childless all night. That is twice in eight years! The first time was last weekend when JC's sister took the kids for a night. You remember, that other romantic night we had together. Yeah, I am not quite sure what happens to me when the kids are gone, but I pretty much get that "woo hoo no rules" feeling that teenagers get when mom and dad leave. Watch out it's a crazy partaaaay over here! I was really having more fun when my BFF was awake. Too bad she had to go to bed. She said something about being in the ER all day, kids being home, responsibilities, yada yada....

I think my sugar high just crashed...zzzzzzzzzzzz! *drooling on the keyboard*

Keepin' It Real!

JC and I have been married ten years now. Wednesday was our anniversary. We had a real romantic evening checking email, job searching, doing dishes, playing Battlefield2 . For the first time EVER since having kids, we have no kids at home all night tonight. It's just the two of us. My sister in law took them for the night. Let me tell ya, there's a party going on here! We had a romantic dinner by candle light soup and grilled cheese sandwiches by computer light, there's been dancing with the broom as I swept the kitchen floor, Sweet nothings being whispered JC talking to his gaming clan about sound cards, Romantic movies playing Company of Heroes video game match playbacks playing, I tell you we really know how to keep the romance alive, don't cha think. I mean we haven't strayed too far from where we started ten years ago. Our dates usually consisted of dancing cheek to cheek under the stars raking or baling hay in the middle of the night or going to poetry readings and romantic restaurants going to institute and to Carrows. He proposed to me during half time of a Chicago Bulls game. It was the epitome of romantic gestures. He got down on one knee in front of millions of people, expressed his love and devotion to me, told me how I was more beautiful than a fall sunset.... He slipped a ring box in my hand as we laid on the couch in his living room. No words. No asking. No drama....there was a brief kiss that was interrupted by half time ending. That is the way we roll, it has been from day one. Like living in a romance novel. *puking*. Just keeping it real!

Friday Night Music Selection

Okay here is the Friday Night Music selection. This is Mindy Smith, One Moment More. There is something about her voice that is haunting to me. She wrote this song about her mom, who passed away.

A Day Late and A Dollar Short

Here is my music post for yesterday. I obviously have not worked on my slacker issues. This is Sammy Kershaw "Love of My Life". I could not get the "real" video to the song to embed, sorry. This song is very old, I know. I am posting about it because on Wednesday it is JC and my 10th wedding anniversary. This is the song he chose to do our first dance to. I think he had more of an idea of how he wanted the wedding to go than I did. Usually girls have their wedding all dreamt up from childhood. Me, not so much. JC I think did though, of course this was his second go around at wedding planning so maybe he felt he had some knowledge on the subject. Enjoy.

Rushing Slacker

Helloooo....

I just realized I am a slacker. Well not just realized, I've always been a slacker and I have pretty much always known I was a slacker. Like when one of my best friends had a baby and I never made it by to see her even though I kept telling her I would. Or when I could have been a straight A student but chose to slide through my education with a couple of B's because, well because I hate homework. Yes, I am a slacker. I bring this up because this last week I have been checking on my blogging buddies and thinking gosh you guys need to post something new! Then I looked at my blog this morning and realized, OH! OOPS! So do I. I realized I said I would post a music post every Friday. Um Yeah! OOPS! I kinda dropped the ball there huh? I did not even realize Friday had come and gone. I am not going to promise you it will never happen again, because I am a realistic slacker, I KNOW it will not only happen again but again and again and again....you get the point. So sorry for my slackerness.

On a different note, I watched a really good movie last night. Dub's Heaver sent it home with me. She knows I am a slacker and is trying to catch me up on all the good movies I have missed out on. She sends a couple to me every week. Last night she rented August Rush. It's been out for a while and I have wanted to see it but well, I am a slacker. So she sent me home with it. I dropped the AC down to 68, put on my PJs, snuggled up in my recliner with my quilt and hot chocolate (pretending I actually live somewhere that PJs, quilts and hot chocolate are needed) and had myself a little chick flick night. I LOVED this movie. If you have not seen it, go now! Go rent it! It will not disappoint, except I wish they would have done more at the end. I won't go any further than to say that, because I don't want to spoil it for those who have not seen it *cough slackers! cough* Oh, I will say this, make sure you buy Kleenex while you are out renting August Rush. You will need them. This movie contained no bad language, nudity, sex or violence which scores HUGE for me. Want to know what also scores HUGE for me? One very attractive Irish man by the name of Jonathan Rhys Meyers. To listen to him talk and sing, makes me giddy like a school girl. And a not too hard on the eyes Australian, Alex O'Loughlin. Oh, and Keri Russell, I like her.

One Line or Two? Pink or Blue?

I have been slightly overstressed lately. This morning I thought I would eliminate a part of that stress by a simple act I like to call doin' the dip stick. Yep, I peed in a cup and dipped in a little stick, waited three VERY long minutes and then breathed a HUGE sigh of relief. Well, the logical side of me breathed a sigh of relief of course the emotional side of me got a little sad. Not that I don't want any more children or that I do want more children, now is just not the time. JC is still looking for a job another HUGE stress factor!!, our house is WAY too small for the six of us already and all we have for transportation is an 85 Chevy diesel truck that only seats three. You don't have to have my mad mathematical skills to know that a family of six can't fit in a truck built for three not legally anyway which I guess a family of seven could still not fit in a truck built for three just as easily so hey what's one more? JC could move his office into our room to free up some space...ahhh shut up emotional! Logical wins this time! So on the pregnancy topic here is a cute little Q&A for ya...


Q: Should I have a baby after 35?
A: No, 35 children is enough.

Q: I'm two months pregnant now. When will my baby move?
A: With any luck, right after he finishes college.

Q: What is the most reliable method to determine a baby's sex?
A: Childbirth.

Q: My wife is five months pregnant and so moody that sometimes she's borderline irrational.
A: So what's your question?

Q: My childbirth instructor says it's not pain I'll feel during labor, but pressure. Is she right?
A: Yes, in the same way that a tornado might be called an air current.

Q: When is the best time to get an epidural ?
A: Right after you find out you're pregnant.

Q: Is there any reason I have to be in the delivery room while my wife is in labor?
A: Not unless the word 'alimony' means anything to you.

Q: Is there anything I should avoid while recovering from childbirth?
A: Yes, pregnancy.

Q: Do I have to have a baby shower?
A: Not if you change the baby's diaper very quickly.

Q: Our baby was born last week. When will my wife begin to feel and act normal again?
A: When the kids are in college.

Partaay Like A Rock Star!!! (or not so much)

I had planned to post about the first two weeks of school tonight, but I got started listening to music on YouTube. Now I am too busy rockin' out to write coherently so here enjoy some music. I love this song. Yes, I realize he is talking about underage drinking, pot smoking, general hell raising and pre-marital sex and it's everything I am telling my kids is wrong which is why I listen on my headphones but when it comes on I just can't not sing along and have a real hard time sitting still! This is my typical Friday night party, YouTube, me and my headphones. Some junk food and a diet Pepsi. Rockin' Out with my bad self. Amidst "the look" from JC. Sometimes the party gets so out of control that he actually has to say something like what the heck are ya doin' you physcho! This is how this is how I married with kids, thirty somethings PARTAAAYY! So I am starting a music Friday here so all you other Rock Starz out there have something to Partaaay too. On Friday I will post all about good music or bad music, music that makes me laugh, dance, cry or just want to scratch my eyes out! Now crank up your speakers....(disclaimer: The Farmer's Wife is in no way liable for any disturbing the peace charges you may face for "cranking up you speakers" at 2am. Neither is she liable for any hospital bills that may result from serious bodily injury from waking sleeping spouses, falling down stairs while doing air guitar, or spousal enforced trips to the phych ward. "Crank up your speakers" at your own risk!)

School Starts in 10, 9, 8....

WOOOHOOO! School starts in 10 hours!!!!!!
Only two @ home for 6 hours!!! I don't know what I am going to do with that.

Actually I do. I am going to sing and dance and giggle! I am going to go swimming with out getting sprayed with a squirt gun, or getting splashed by a newly invented dive (i.e. a new way to belly flop), and with out having to have the "NOT WITH OUT YOUR ARM FLOATIES" argument with Buzz. I am going to enjoy just having to entertain two. I am going to enjoy having the loudest two gone, the two who constantly stir the pot and cause tantrum after tantrum...gone! I am going to revel in this first week of no homework.

Then next week when the homework starts I will be wondering is it all worth it. The six hours a day, is it worth the nightly homework tantrums, the fights over why Vootz can't do his book report on The Hulk comic book. The constant bombardment of school fliers about fundraisers, school pictures, book fairs, book orders (i.e. BYE BYE $$$)PTC meetings, staff appreciation lunches, science projects, field trip chaperoning, classroom parties. Is it worth having to actually be out of bed and functioning before 8 am every morning?

It just very well may be worth it!

Slippery When Wet! Wet When Slipping!

I was turning off the boy's computer one night as they were getting ready to go to bed when I heard this very loud thump, followed by screaming and a bunch of boys running into the office all talking a mile a minute. I am only catching bits and pieces of what each of them is trying to tell me as I am trying to climb over them and out of the office to investigate the thump. I finally get that Dub has taken a header off the kitchen counter. I shove the boys aside and run into the kitchen to find Dub sitting on the floor with his head in his hands crying. I survey the damage...
-blood? No blood
-obvious broken bones? No
-pupils equal? Check
-pupils reactive? Check
-ginormous goose egg? Present and accounted for.
Vootz, being the hero again gives him an ice pack, his "fluvy and bebe" (security blanket and teddy bear)and I give him some Tylenol, because judging from the size of that goose egg, he is going to have one heck of a head ache! Then I snuggle him in the recliner and he finally calms down enough that I can talk to him. Do some more testing...
-What's your name? W
-How old are you? 2
-Who's this? Bebe
-How many finger is this? 3
-What happened to you? I bonked it my head.
-How did you do that? I fall off it the counter.
-Why were you on the counter? I wuv firsty and getting a drink.
-You have been told to stay off the counter. Did you learn your lesson? No I bonked it.
-How's your tummy feel, is it going to throw up? No, I bonked it my head not my tummy.
Okay. Put Thomas the Tank Engine on for Dub, put the other boys in bed, assure them Dub will be fine. Call my dad (he's a fireman) to assure myself Dub will be fine. He list off all the check points I already did and tells me to give him Tylenol and put Thomas the Tank Engine on for him for an hour or so and make sure he doesn't throw up, then go through the check points again before putting him to bed. Make sure to wake him up after a couple of hours to check on him and then let him go back to sleep and he should be fine. Thank dad for the re-assurance that I am not being a bad mom by not taking my kid to the urgent care. (When I worked in the urgent care I hated it when "those" kind of moms rushed their kids into the urgent care for every little thing. Yet, sometimes I find myself having a hard time not being one of "those" kind of moms.)

Now that the adrenaline has ceased. I notice my shirt is soaking wet. What the heck! I look over at Dub and he is naked on the bottom half, wet clothes sitting beside him ON MY BED!
Me-"Dub did you pee on me?"
Dub(never taking his eyes off Thomas)-"No, I fall off the counter and scare it pee out of me.
Me-"When you fell off the counter, it scared the pee out of you?"
Dub-"Uh-huh"
Me-"Would you please take your pee pee clothes off my bed and put them in the laundry? No, I can't, I got a bonk it."
IRRR...
I change my shirt and call Vootz in for a calmer version of the first story he was trying to tell me. It turns out Dub was squatting on the counter, facing the cupboard. While attempting to pour himself a glass of water from the just re-filled Brita pitcher the water in the top caused the lid to come off spilling it all over the tile counter top (CAUTION: Slippery When Wet!) and thus slipped off the counter backwards, landing back of the head first. Evidently peeing on the way down (CAUTION: Wet When Slipping!). Which got all over me while I was rocking him in the chair.

Note to any Brita executives that might happen by my blog. I love your pitchers but you need to make a locking lid for those suckers!

Finally, Infested!

I promised you over here that I would give you a blog about our infestation. I have been putting it off and putting it off. Well after tonight's incident I am putting it off no more. So with out further procrastination here ya go...

At the beginning of summer we had a red ant problem. They were all over my front yard, entry way, side walks and flower beds. Then they started coming under my front door, through my outlets and through the exhaust outlet for my stove. After using a whole can of RAID and not deterring them I finally decided to call the pest man. He came out and sprayed inside and out and told me if the ants came back with in two months they would come back for free. Cool. His first visit was on a Tuesday, Thursday the ants were in one of my kitchen cupboards. So I called the pest man back and he came on Friday morning to spray again. Saturday morning I woke up and the ants were in a different cupboard. Well it is Saturday and the pest man doesn't work weekends so I empty that cupboard wash the ants off all of my cups and bust out a new can of RAID. I spray the cupboard and let it sit over night. Get up Sunday morning to wash out said cupboard and the ants are now in my silverware drawer. WHAT THE HECK MAN! So I do this ant chasing cycle. They make their way through every cupboard and drawer I have EXCEPT the cupboards with food in them, go figure and THANK GOODNESS! Then they were gone. Last week I noticed that they were in the lawn and flower beds again. I make a mental note to call the pest man. I of course forget.

Tonight while I was saying goodbye to my dad, step mom and little brother I hear a blood curdling scream. I looked over to see Vootz trying to push Rub off the entry way, they were both screaming. At first I figured they were fighting until I noticed Vootz was swatting at Rubs legs then his, then back at Rubs. What the heck! So I investigate the screams and funky movements because I am a good mom like that sometimes. Both of their legs and feet are crawling with ants. I don't mean one or two I mean hundreds of ants! My entire front step looks like it is literally alive and this in just a matter of minutes, because they were not there when we walked out.

It turns out Rub had stopped on the front porch on his way back into the house to wait for me. Vootz noticed the ants on his way up to the front door just as they started biting Rub. Rub did not know what to do, he just stood there dancing in the pile and screaming! Being the incredible big brother that he is, Vootz stepped into the swarm to help his brother out on to clear ground and sweep away the ants and in the process got covered himself.

I brush the ants off Rub while Vootz brushes them off himself. My Step mom hollers from the car as they are driving away to make sure I have some children's Benedryl and in a frazzled state I say yes, when what I really mean is no I don't, yes please go get me some fast! Alright she says see ya later and off they go. It dawns on me that I did not communicate effectively and quick run in and call my mother in law, who is at my sister in laws house then on her way to mine. Tell her to steal what ever children's Benedryl Brina has and hurry up.
Give Vootz adult Benedryl, he has very bad reactions to ants and can't wait and needs a big dose anyway. Calm Rub down and give him the last 1/2 tsp. of Benedryl Brina had and pray that he doesn't react the way Vootz does because if he does that 1/2tsp. is not going to do it.

They are both doing fine.

As if Vootz was not heroic enough the first time. While I was helping Rub, Dub stepped out on the porch and Vootz jumped right over and scooped him to safety risking more bites to himself. What a good big brother. It's moments like these that make me so proud of them. By the way the ants, they left as quickly as they came. I swear. They were not on the doorstep when we walked my family out, then with in five minutes they were swarming, and by the time my mother in law got there fifteen minutes later they were all gone but may be a half dozen or so. Freaky little things. I will be calling the pest man out tomorrow and we will be having a firm little talk on using some HEAVY DUTY pesticide, not this mild non toxic, environmentally friendly, might as well be water stuff he used the last two times. I don't care if I have to pack up and leave for a day or two. I want those suckers DEAD!

And yes, I know if my kids are so allergic I should never let myself run out of children's Benedryl or adult Benedryl. Pfizer people are you listening? I need a lifetime supply of Benedryl over here.

What? What Was That You Said?

Okay, I found this on another blog, but it was cool so I wanted to share it with you. These are new mosquito ring tones. Made to not be able to be heard by adults.(i.e. teachers) No silly, I don't think that is cool. What is cool is that I can hear at 24 and younger 18khz. Rock on with my 24 year old self! Because we all know I am not a day over 24 right? I had my boys listen to the others because seriously I did not think there was ANY sound at all. I was wrong. The little heathens can actually hear those tones. Poor old JC did not fair well with this hearing test. We won't go into details because we don't want to embarrass him with his old man hearing. Lets just say he should have listened to his young wife and turned down battlefield2, the TV, the Radio, his family and wore protective ear thingies when he was working. But you know the wise more mature, cradle robbing men always know so much more about everything than their young innocent, naive, beautiful wives possibly could. Click over to this link and take the test. Let me know how you did in the comments.

A No Brainer!

Everyone was home today, JC, all four boys and myself. We did some yard work this morning. It took longer than I expected it to. By the time we finished and ate lunch Dub was tired and grumpy but it was 2 O'clock which is too late to put him down for a nap and still get him to go to bed at 7. So as I was debating whether to put him down at 2 and then just let him stay up late or let him stay up and go down at 7. The phone rang and the conversation went like this...
Me-"Hello"
Her-"Hello is this Mrs. Moncur?"
Me-"yes"
Her-"This is Jane from Houchin Blood Bank. I am calling to let you know that you are eligible to donate blood again and we are having a blood drive this week. Would you like to make an appointment?"
Me-"No thank you if I get time this week I will try to stop by."
Her-"Okay thank you, have a nice day. Good bye."
Me-"You too. Good Bye."

Then someone turned off Thomas The Tank Engine and Dub started crying and Rub and Buzz were arguing. JC was yelling at his computer. And I began thinking...

Option 1:
Stay home with 5 tired and grumpy boys.

Option 2:
Drive in a truck with no A/C or radio through Rosedale traffic. Have a poke in my finger followed by having a Huge needle plunged deep into my left arm. Have nurse dig around in left arm with HUGE needle because that vein looks nice but is a roller that only one person in my entire life has ever been able to get (KMC Anesthesiologist)but every nurse thinks they can do it and even though I give them fair warning they still try. Then have another nurse come dig around to find the vein only to have them pull out the needle and say maybe your right arm will be better. Ya Think!? Pump up the vein in my right arm, have new needle jabbed in and give up 1 pint of the dark red gold. Get a Popsicle, a glass of juice and a t-shirt and head back to the truck with no A/C.

What would you do? Ya, me too. I was gone like a flash! A whole hour with no kids and no grouchy husband not that I mind being with JC. I actually love to spend time with him, just not when he is grouchy.

On my way home I decided that 1 hour just was not long enough since the blood bank was right across the street from my mom's office I should probably poke my head in there and say hi and tell her about everything that has been going on for the last two hours since I talked to her last. I also decided I needed to have a diet Pepsi while I was there because with all that talking I got a little thirsty. Then I need to use the facilities, because that was my fourth diet pepsi since noon and I like the smell of the hand soap there.

Then I decided while I was out I should just stop at the store for a loaf of bread and some milk. You know "trip linking" to try to save fuel and all. Oh and I might need to check the price of sardines, not that I eat sardines but it might be worth knowing how much they cost. Maybe I should grab some peaches too, over on the other side of the store, and if I am going to get peaches I should probably go back to the dairy case way over there to get some yogurt. I better make sure I grab something sweet for JC too, after all I did ditch him with 4 grouchy boys. I should also grab something for the boys since I ditched them with their grouchy dad.

Wow, 5 O'clock really? I should probably go home now, since I have the keys to the pantry and they might need to eat dinner and go to bed.

Me to JC- "Wow, it's been a long afternoon I am tired."
JC- *The look, again!*

Oh, and I came home to a totally thrashed house, but it was so worth it.

Baptized and Going To Jail

A big huge THANK YOU to my brother in law for getting me back up and running! So much has gone on since my computer crashed...again. But I had even more to tell you about before it crashed that I just was procrastinating about so lets get started.

First Vootz turned the big 8 and was baptized. A very emotional day for the whole family. It seems that on these special occasions we feel the loss of father that much more. Maybe it is because on those special days is when he is right there with us and we feel his spirit that much stronger. I know he is very proud of Vootz and the choices he is making. We miss him a lot. Sometimes I find Vootz standing and staring at his picture on the hutch and tears will just be streaming down his little cheeks. I never say anything to him because I figure that he is taking a special moment and I would never want him to feel like he shouldn't or to be embarrassed. But I always have to leave the room because it chokes me up. They were best buds those two, Bumper Boy and Buppa Dude.

Wipe your eyes, we are moving on.

We rented a van for the weekend of Vootz's baptism so we would all be able to get to and from the weekend events together in one car without having to rely on other family members to transport half of us. I LOVED having that van! We all fit, it had A/C and a radio, it did not cost 200.00 to fill the tank, and it was so easy to park in the little tiny parking spaces. I asked JC if we could scrape off the VIN and change the plates. He did not think I was funny. Neither did I, I was serious as a heart attack until he pointed out that he would be going to jail for a KIA. I replied, if it was a suburban would you? I just got the look and the head shake. You know the one that they use when they are wondering what they were thinking when they married you. I get that look a lot.

Next installments: Infestation, The Fish and The Whale, Head Meet Floor and Why Am I Wet?, Buzz Turns 6 and The Jedi's Have Landed.

Ahh Phooey!

My computer is down...again. I am stealing five minutes of JC's "strictly for gaming" computer to tell you that I have a lot to tell you when I get my computer back. Soon hopefully. My wonderfully sweet and very computer savvy brother in law is fixing it for me so hopefully I will be back up this week.

No Time Like Procrastination Time

Okay I don't have time to write an original blog today but for a good laugh read over here. I stumbled on it this morning. Big things spinning in my head for tomorrows blog please don't hold your breath, it may be sooo big it takes days to write. Or not. Have a great day!

Home Sick

I grew up in a small mountain ranching community boasting a population of a whopping 130 people. Even though we did not have our own "ranch" we had some livestock and my mom's family are all ranchers as far back as I know. I even have two uncle's (one, and two) who are very notable people world wide for their horse knowledge, that they got by being sons of a rancher. Geesh, I am off topic already and have not even begun. Now that I have bragged about my uncles let me get on with my point.

When I was growing up in this huge town of 130 people, I wanted nothing more than to leave. I hated wearing my sisters hand me down Wranglers and polo shirts (she is a tom boy). I wanted name brands like Guess, Gucci and definitely not in hand me down form ( I am ALL girly girl). I wanted a mani-pedi, dad wanted me to chop fire wood. I wanted to go shopping on Saturday, dad wanted me to help the neighbors brand cattle. I wanted something more exciting than crickets and frogs to listen to in the evening hours. I wanted my dates to not consist of going across the county line bridge for dancing by the creek because we could raise heck and our county sheriff could not bust us and the next county's sheriff was two hours away. I hated being considered a "hick". I hated that we could never leave for vacation because we had animals that we needed to feed and milk. I hated having to be bussed more than an hour to get to high school in the city. The weekend I graduated high school I took a job in the city and moved. I forgot all about my country roots, or so I thought. I was a city girl now!

Well two and a half years after I moved to the city I met JC. He was a flat lander. A farmer. He lived on the outskirts of the city but farmed about twenty minutes out. I decided very early on I was never going to marry a rancher and live in the mountains, but I had never said I would never marry a farmer. So we married. Mountain ranching girl turned city girl marries flat land alfalfa farmer. Ever heard the expression you can take the girl out of the country but you can't take the country out of the girl? That is so totally true. About the time I had Vootz I wanted to move back to the mountains. Try as I might I could not get JC to move. Something about not being able to grow crops on mountain sides, covered in oak trees. Go figure. We are technically living a "country" life style with the farming and all but ranching and farming really are very different, so are the flat lands and the mountains.

I have been reading over here a lot. (I am so addicted to her) She makes me homesick. I miss seeing the cattle, horses, rodeos, brandings, team roping and cattle drives. I miss the sounds and smells. I miss crisp mornings and laying in bed at night with the window open (because we lived in the middle of nowhere we could do that with out fear of being killed) like I was saying, laying in bed smelling the dew come in and hearing the frogs and crickets sing their lullabies. I miss the creeks and snow days and the smell of autumn. I miss the small town, everyone knows your last sneeze, atmosphere. I miss my horse and the sound of the bit clinking in her mouth, the sound of the saddle, (how to explain that to someone who has never been in a saddle I have no clue.) The softness of her nose. Here I am again trotting off into lala land. Back to my point, because I do have one.

The more I read over here the more I miss it. I have embraced a lot of my country roots again having been married to a farmer. I sport the occasional pair of jeans that are not worthy of the city fashion scene, I sport the John Deere logo frequently (which I would have NEVER done growing up), I work hard next to my husband unafraid to break a freshly manicured nail. I love to go out to the fields under all the stars that you just can't see in the city. I love to hear the sounds and smell the dew, but I really miss the mountains and flat land country is better than city but it is just not the mountains.

So, I guess my point is this, number one, thank you Ree for all the memories of what ranch life is. You detail it so perfectly it is almost like being "home", until a child screams and then I am plopped back into reality. Number two, I am almost hoping we do have to move to a nice, rural, small town, ranching community hopefully in the mountains, because dang if Ree hasn't made my homesickness all that much more present in my mind. (BTW Ree, nothing against the prairie, it is incredibly gorgeous, but I love my mountains.)

My dad took two of my boys "home" with him yesterday. They have talked about nothing else for the last twenty four hours. It has been all about the cows, the horses, the tree and rock climbing, snake hunting *shivers*(glad that was unsuccessful), the creek and just bein' able to run, run, run. They fell asleep fast and hard when they got home, it was NICE! Thanks Daddy, next time can I stow away too?

On Your Mark. Get Set. Go!

Today while I am gobbling down cheesy bread sticks drowned in dipping sauce (all low fat and low calorie I am certain.) Nice and steamy hot still, with melty stringy cheese from our local pizza place. Delivered right to my door by...by...well there is no way to sugar coat it, a really creepy man. I began to feel bad for JC who is by now choking down yet another boring sandwich with one hand as he drives through a field of wheat. In my defense, being the totally kick butt domestic goddess that I am, I do make homemade bread for his sandwiches and try to vary the contents daily so he gets a variety ranging anywhere from egg salad to roast beef. I also add a variety of sides like Cheetos, Doritos or Maui onion chips. A piece of fruit and some snacks for his late days like almonds, peanuts and always a variety of candy for his sweet tooth. My Gosh does the man have a sweet tooth! I also try to put in some homemade sweet for his dessert, be it a brownie or cookie. As much as I try to switch it up for him I feel like if the poor guy has to gag down another sandwich I might just barf out of pure sympathy for him. Breakfast is just as daunting. Right now we rotate between a sausage or bacon egg and cheese muffin, breakfast burritos or crumb donuts.

So my questions to my loyal readers are these...
Do you make your husband breakfast, is it just a bowl of cocoa puffs or something more substantial? Does he even eat breakfast at all?
Do you pack lunches for your husbands?
What do you pack? Is it a mystery to him everyday, something exciting he can't wait to find out about or is it the same ol' thing.
I need ideas quick so I thought I would start a little friendly contest. You send me your ideas/recipes for breakfast, lunch, dessert and snacks, I try them out on Farmer JC. We both get to judge because I have to make it of course. You will be judged on:

1. Taste
2. Ease of eating one handed while driving a tractor through a wheat field without getting sticky and shmootzed, he hates that!
3. Ability to hold up in a lunch box while bouncing around on a tractor
4. How easy/time consuming it was to prepare
5. How common the ingredients are to my kitchen (think good ol' comfort food)

Got it? Good, now get busy! Quick! Save my husband from the dreadful rut his wife has fallen into! He will love you for it! Maybe even so much he would suggest all on his own of course with no bribing from me that I offer up a slight reward to the idea he loved the best! Email your entries to farmerjcswife@yahoo.com

Ps. If it contains mushrooms or mountains of garlic, I guarantee you will lose. Just a tip. You're welcome.

Irrational Much?

There was the roller coaster, Here is the ride!

The thought of moving away to a new town, new state, new house, starting a new job, new friends beginning a new chapter of our lives together with a clean slate is kind of exciting. Having to rely on each other and knowing that everything is new to both of us and together we will forge this new path. That is one of those atop the first big hill of the roller coaster kind of moments. It's a new and exciting unknown kind of high.

Then there is the reality that we know NO ONE! We have no external support system. What if we move in the middle of winter to a town that has four feet of snow and JC is called out right away for a job that will take five days to do and I have no fire wood cut yes, I know that is stupid and that heaters have been invented, and here is where my Dad would jump in and say, "Then you buck up and pick up the ax and chop your dang wood yourself, like I taught you to do at age 7. Instead of bein' the whiny, spoiled, pansy city slicker you've turned into." What if I need groceries while he is gone, how will I get to the store. What if the boys get sick or hurt, or worse what if I get sick or hurt, who will I call? no, not the Ghost Busters! What if we move to a small, close knit community, not unlike the one I grew up in that doesn't welcome outsiders. That would be called KARMA. These would be the lack of momentum arguments, aka at the bottom.

I love my neighbors that I have now. more importantly they love us, well at least they love Dub. I have great friends and family so close I could spit on them. I know what parts of town are "The Hood" I know this because I have lived there, I know what parts of town you just DO NOT go to unless you want to be found dead in an ally. I know this town! Yes, I am good at making friends, yes getting away from family might not actually be a bad idea, yes I am probably smart enough to figure out what side of the tracks I should or should not be on. These are the half way up arguments.

When I am awake I can pretty much control my roller coaster. Meaning, when I start getting all teary eyed at the thought of Dub having to kiss his Heavver goodbye and me having to explain to our family that we are leaving, and to the boys that they will have to make new friends in a new school, I can pretty much start thinking about the adventure of it all and end up back on top. When I am asleep however I have ZERO control of my roller coaster, this leads to a VERY bad nights sleep, which in turn leads to JC having a bad night too. (Sorry Honey.) Off topic sorry. Some nights I wake up terrified, others just sad and crying, others the adrenalin is rushing through me so fast thinking about the adventures that lay ahead I wake up ready to bound out of bed at two a.m. Whatever my last thoughts were of before I wake up for the day are generally a good indicator of where I will start my morning until something sends me crashing back to the bottom or holding my breath at the top with eager anticipation.

The stupid thing about this whole roller coaster is this, I MAKE MYSELF RIDE! Yes, you read that right. I am putting myself through all this when JC doesn't even have a job anywhere yet. We could be staying right here in Smogtown. I make myself ride however, because IF we do decide to leave, it will be fast. I am talking here one week gone the next. So if I don't get a hold of all my emotions and prepare myself now for what may or may not be I will be stuck in a town with no support system, a husband at work and sobbing on the kitchen floor in front of my boys. I have to be able to be strong and deal when (and if) I do move. So now I figure is the best time to be a basket case, when I have family and friends around to support me in all my irrational thoughts.

Speaking of irrational thoughts and neighbors, I just lost mine. Irrational thought that is, because my neighbor "Dub's Heavver" just came over to barrow my cell phone charger, because we are great neighbors and friends, we do these things. I bake them bread, they mow my lawn. It's that kind of neighbor that I am afraid I won't be able to find in another town. As if I have the only one to ever exist right here in Smogtown. I know, irrational. Like it or lump it's my roller coaster.

Six Flags Kiwi Style

Do you like roller coasters? I love roller coasters! I love them so much in fact that I have managed to create my very own roller coaster. It is however not a fun, Six Flags kind of ride. It is my very own emotional roller coaster. I ride this emotional roller coaster several times a day. Some days I start out on top of that roller coaster, waiting to feel the wind rush through my hair and feel like I am soaring like a bird on the wind currents of life. Then there are the days I start at the bottom of the roller coaster. The excitement has ceased and the adrenalin is gone. The climb back to the top so very iffy clank. clank. clank. and sometimes I wonder if that chain is gonna slip and send me crashing back to the bottom before I get to the top. Where I start the day depends on the dreams I had the night before. Sometimes I even start in that very iffy half way up position. Feel the optimistic attitude in "half way up" not down, that drives JC nuts, he is the half way down kinda of guy.

All this is very deep I know. Before you diagnose me as bipolar let me explain what built this beast of a roller coaster to begin with.

When JC was farming, I was neither here nor there about it. It was his job, I missed him when he was gone and I hated that for several months a year there was NO income and never any benefits. On the flip side, I loved that we were in agriculture ( I have very deep ag roots), I loved that he owned his own business and when he had to he could not go to work, mostly to save my bum for some situation I'd managed to get myself in, like oh, being knocked up and in labor. I loved that he was home in the winter. I loved to go out with him in the middle of the night to change water or bale hay. I did not even mind moving irrigation pipe in 115 degree heat. And face it I think his tractor's sexy! Just makin' sure you're still listening.

When JC decided to quit in December I was also here nor there but frantically started searching for jobs because insecurity freaks me out! So for the last six months I have been searching the entire North American Continent (well mostly the western states and western Canada) for jobs. I have sent out probably 60+ resumes and have had one response from a company here. That response we had to turn down because it seems it was posted wrong and won't even pay enough to cover our rent, much less groceries for the growing appetites of our boys. I have however had responses from a few out of state companies. There is the foundation for this roller coaster.

To be continued...

You Are Cordially Invited To A Pity Party!

Welcome to my Pity Party! It's so good to see you all. You look fabulous! Lets get this pary started shall we.

Since November JC has been home pretty much 24/7, like most farmers there is not a lot of work to do in the winter. Then in December JC decided to quit our farm for a job that would allow him to be home more often in the summer months and have steady pay in the winter months and has been job hunting for the last 6 months with no luck. No luck that is until another farmer asked him to help do some custom grain harvesting for a couple of months. Not that grain harvesting is going to give him better hours and steady pay, but it will pay the rent which is kind of, oh I don't know IMPORTANT! I went from having a husband home 24/7, which has it's advantages and disadvantages, to having my husband home pretty much NEVER! If he was still working for himself, the hours would not be much different I suppose but it just seems like I see him less now than when he worked for himself. Absence makes the heart grow fonder! I MISS MY HUSBAND!

To add to my aching heart, which has me in emotional turmoil. He started this job the week that school got out. I have no husband, but I have a house full of kids who also miss their dad and are handling their emotions about as well as mommy, and who have endless amounts of energy. We have no back yard to send them to. Our travels were limited to where we could go on bikes since JC now has the truck all day, but now Buzz has a flat tire and no way to get to Tarjay to get a new tube. I am pretty much stranded with 4 rambunctious boys with nothing to do! Did I mention also our t.v. broke this morning? Yep it did. I might just lose my marbles before school starts again in August.

It is JC's 35th birthday tomorrow. I think I will bake him his favorite Red Velvet cake with Cream Cheese frosting. Not that he will be home to eat it, but that I will be thinking about him. Now to get to the store to get the ingredients, Oh that's right I can't go to the store! Looks like JC will get birthday pancakes instead. Which I am sure he will just love because pancakes rank right up there with, oh I don't know, liver and onions, not that he will be here to eat them anyway.

To all of you military spouses I am sorry. I know I have it no where near as bad as you do. I really have no right to complain at all. I don't know how you do it. You amaze me. I am thankful for your sacrifices and your spouses service. May your family be blessed, comforted and protected. Our service men and women are incredible and so are their families! My family and I keep you in our prayers always and are very appreciative of all you do.

Thank you all for coming to my Pity Party. Drive home safely!

If You Give A Dub A Cookie and The Super Hero's Princess!

Rub- "Momma I'n gonna tew you a fecwit in you eaw"
Me- "Ok Rub what's your secret?"
Rub-"I hab thuper powerth!"
Me-"Super powers! Wow that's cool Rub! What are your super powers?"
Rub-"I can go vroomin fats! Wike dis. VROOOM! *runs away*

A little later....
I was sitting in the chair and Rub was kneeling on the floor in front of me. I was wearing a pink tank top and grey sweater.

Me-"Rub what are you doing?"
Rub-"I'n button up you fwetter."
Me-" Why?"
Rub-"Cauve you pink iv chowing"
Me-"What's wrong with my pink showing?"
Rub-"I don't wike pink, it a girl cuwer"
Me-"Well I am a girl"
Rub-"No you not! You a mommy"
Me-"Mommys are girls Rub"
Rub-"No dair not, dair juft modelf and pwinfef"
Me-"So am I a model or a princess?"
Rub-*holding my cheeks in his hands*"You my pwinfef"
Awwwww! I love this boy!

JC-"Dub what are you doing out of bed? Your suppose to be asleep"
Dub-"I'm firsty about it"
Me-"Get your drink and go to bed."
Dub-"I wan fweep in the carpet"
Me-"No go to your bed"
Dub-"But I'm scared about it"
JC-"Scared about what Dub?"
Dub-"Scared about ummm...*sees JC's cookies* I need a cookie"
JC-"Take a bite and then you need to go to bed"
Dub-"But I'm firsty about it"
JC gives him another drink
Dub-"What dya got dair?"
Me-"Spicy candy, go to bed"
Dub-"I want some spicy about it"
Me-"No go to bed"
Dub-"You cwoss about it?"
Me-"Yes! I am cross about it! GO TO BED!"
Dub-"I firsty about it!"
I don't know where he got the whole "about it" thing but that follows most of his sentences. As far as "are you cross" um yes we watch too much Thomas the Tank Engine.