Sunday, September 28, 2008

Talking To Myself....again

Life is sucking a bit more lately. I had what I thought was an unexplainable knee injury last week. I was really hurting and had no idea why. Then a few days later I got what I thought were spider bites on my inner thigh. Then a strange patch of blisters showed up on my inner knee too. The whole inner thigh connecting both patches of blisters was very tender to the touch. This is when it dawned on me, are you ready?...Ahhhh Crap! I have a Shingles out break! Yep. You heard me Shingles!
This is not the first, nor will it be my last outbreak of this lovely virus. When I wear myself out physically, mentally and emotionally for too long I get sick. It usually starts with simple things like headache, nausea. Sometimes I will get a sore throat or just break out like a hormonal teenager. When I fail to heed these warnings my body gives me it starts to shout a little louder. I imagine it saying something like this,
"Hey STUPID!" this is a cuss word in our house. So my body is being very serious now. Like I was saying, or my body was saying, "Hey STUPID, I need to rest. I tried to make you just tired and you did not rest. I tried to make your head hurt so bad that all you would want to do was close your eyes, but you just put on sunglasses, I tried to make you throw up anything you ate but you just quit feeding me not that you were giving me proper nutrition to begin with, if you were I probably would not be in the state I am in. And NO, Pepsi and chocolate donuts is NOT proper nutrition! So because you fail to heed my gentle warnings I will have to hit you with the mother load! You have to stay home because it would not be responsible of you to expose chicken pox (that is the same virus) to anyone who has not had them yet. Think of the little babies and little old grannies and gramps's out there. So stay home and don't think you'll be able to do anything but rest, because the pain is so severe you'll just want to take Benedryl and Vicodin and go to bed. So haha you body neglecting moron, take that! Maybe now you will start listening to me."

To which I reply, "Shingles is that the best you have? Shingles, really? I have four kids, a husband and a BFF and her family who all need me right now and you think a little case of Shingles is going to keep me down. I can rest when I am dead! This is in no way an invitation for you to die on me! Please give me a real warning before that happens, like maybe a headache so bad I just want to close my eyes. What's that you say? You've tried that before? Hmmm.


Beyla said...

oh no you poor thing!!! So painfull and so NOT cool. Have you tried yelling at it? I tried that once when I had a migrene attack and THAt was a bad idea, boy o boy.. Apparently my head didn't approve of yelling at the time and me barf. a whole lot. but the rash shouldn't be able to make your head burst if yelling, so it might work? no?
Just remember, the best way to take care of family is to take care of yourself. Not kidding! Here, have an oatmeal-and-raisins cookie. They always makes me feel better (thus the big batch made at 11.30pm last night)

Maria said...

kkkkk0ksssssssssssssssssssssssssssss...that is from bentley (sorry)...but i hope you get better FAST! man, that is totally crappy...i think i have a weak immune system myself, no matter how hard i try i still get sick way more than ben! i wish i was down your way, and i'd love to take your kids for a playdate!